Really deep thoughts… Just warning you 😉
You can tell more about a person by what he says about others than you can by what others say about him.~Audrey Hepburn
During my senior year of high school, I was captain of the cheerleading squad and voted onto the Homecoming Court. For classmates who didn’t truly know me, what could they have possibly inferred/said about my character based on those facts? Perhaps they thought I was an extrovert, outgoing, popular, fun, athletic, or loved to dance. On the flip side, maybe they assumed I was flirtatious, a gossip, a partier, snobby, had a mid to low level intelligence level, or was preoccupied with my own looks. If anyone is reading this, what characteristics do you think of when you hear the word ‘cheerleader’? Did I list any of the same ones that came to your mind? Are they mostly positive or negative? If positive, I probably just scored brownie points with you because your character/interests are relatable to qualities you associate in this area. If negative, you may have had a bad experience with a particular cheerleader or homecoming contest, find the qualities you associate in this area undesirable, or harbor animosity from unattaining these labels yourself. This would have resulted in reducing your impression of me to some scale. But, the big point to understand here is the positive or negative impressions you are shaping about me are based on your own paradigms (which everybody does) and not actually my attributes at all. In fact, I haven’t given you any other information about myself after the first sentence.
In my current career of Operations Analyst/Tool Developer, I spend much time alone in my office scrubbing data or writing code in order to build tools, systems, or processes. From co-workers who don’t know me outside of the workplace, I have been described as quiet, professional, highly intelligent, and having a polished appearance. What other connotations might one associate with this type of field? Geeky, high-tech, introverted, quirky, having no common sense, well-paid, or having few friends? Similar to before, what characteristics came to your mind and did any correlate with qualities I listed? Were they mostly positive or negative, why, and how did they affect your assessment of me?
I have held these titles (and many others) of seemingly polar opposite attributes. I am an independent, straight, christian, female, student and photographer who also dabbles in dancing, painting, cooking, gardening, etc… Every one of these labels shapes another layer of your impression about me without truly knowing anything about my real ethics, motivations, desires, or dreams. Yet, underneath them all is a beautifully woven, although imperfect, masterpiece ~me~ that makes sense.
I guess my point is, merely a small percentage of people in our lives get the opportunity to glimpse past the paradigms in order to see our true selves. These should be the people whose positive or constructive feedback impacts our decisions and paths. Anybody else is truly just an outsider with possible alterior motives. Therefore, never overvalue or rely on casual compliments. Conversely, never let a negative comment or gossip deflate your attitude/mood since it is typically their ideals and failures they are fearful of.
The wicked envy and hate; it is their way of admiring- Victor Hugo
Walk with the dreamers, the believers, the courageous, the cheerful, the planners, the doers, the successful people with their heads in the clouds and their feet on the ground. Let their spirit ignite a fire within- Unknown